Nearly 103,000 9th graders in Hanoi took the 10th grade entrance exam, of which public high schools only recruited about 80,000 students. Thus, after the exam, about 23,000 students failed all their wishes.
Besides the joy and happiness of many candidates and their relatives, there are still tens of thousands of students who have to accept sadness and disappointment that is difficult to fill.
On online forums, parents shared their regrets when their children were only 0.25 points short of being admitted.
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The mother and aunt holding flowers waiting for their child in front of the Tran Phu High School exam site once shared with reporters: "My child has tried very hard, so even if he fails, he will regret it." |
“Last night was a sleepless night for both mother and child because the child failed all of his wishes. In the practice exams, the child always got high scores, so the mother subjectively did not register for a private school as a backup. Now she does not know what to do,” is the thought of a mother whose child failed the exam.
Don't get frustrated with a test
Nearly 103,000 9th graders in Hanoi took the 10th grade entrance exam, of which public high schools only recruited about 80,000 students. Thus, after the exam, 23,000 students failed all their wishes.
Ms. To Thi Hai Yen, Principal of Giang Vo Secondary School (Hanoi) advised the students: You have tried very hard throughout the long journey, so today, even though the results are not as expected, please accept them with a calm mind. We should understand that in exams, passing or failing is normal.
"Failure in the exam is not the end of the road. Students should not feel stuck or hopeless, but should find another way to reach their desired destination," said Ms. Yen.
Ms. Yen also believes that the attitude, perception, and behavior towards “first failures in life” will also contribute to determining the long and wide path ahead for students. There are still many paths and choices, so she hopes that students will stay calm, look at the problem positively, and choose a new direction with their families such as studying at a private school, learning a trade, etc.
Parents and teachers are similar in that they always love and have high expectations for their students and children and are never "disappointed" just because their students do not do well in exams.
Adults understand the story of failing an exam from a more multifaceted perspective, which can be likened to a vaccine that helps increase immunity to many situations and challenges in life. With a long life, failure in this or that is inevitable for everyone, what is important is how we deal with failure.
“Some people sink into sadness, others stand up strongly, continue on another path, maybe a roundabout, longer, more difficult path, but all have the same destination and the glory is no less,” Ms. To Thi Hai Yen, Principal of Giang Vo Secondary School (Hanoi) told students.
For parents, those who have accompanied their children must have had high expectations, but when their children fail an exam, this is the time to show love, tolerance, and encouragement so that their children can see that sadness is as small as a grain of sand. Parents need to limit their expressions of anxiety so as not to add more burden to their children's shoulders. Today,education has proactively opened up many directions and opportunities for students to choose from.
There are many different paths to success in life, not necessarily the path that parents have planned or envisioned. You can go fast or slow, as long as you continue to strive to achieve your dreams, any destination is glorious and worthy of recognition.
"Even though they have failed at first, I believe that if they receive enough warm affection from their parents, relatives, and teachers, they will have more confidence and make more efforts to continue studying," said Ms. Yen.
Parental response is more important than grades
Master Nguyen Dinh Son, a child psychology expert at the Hanoi Educational Psychology Association, said that for 15-year-old students, failing the 10th grade public school entrance exam can be a “shock”. The first reaction will be tears, prolonged silence, or shy looks at parents..., some students even feel empty and hopeless. Those reactions and emotions are completely normal.
In psychology, this is the shock-denial-sadness stage - and the time it takes to adjust. It's not the outcome that hurts, but the attachment to a single path that's too great.
According to Mr. Son, parents need to tell their children that failing public school entrance exams does not mean being incompetent.
Many students and parents think that failing a public exam is proof that they are "not good", "useless", or "lost their future". This is an extreme way of thinking, coming from the mentality of identifying self-worth with exam results. Meanwhile, true success comes from the ability to adapt, the spirit of overcoming difficulties and knowing how to stand up after failure. Those who grow up strong are often those who have experienced failure without losing themselves.
Mr. Son emphasizes that at this time, parents' reactions are more important than grades. Scolding, criticizing or comparing children with others will cause children to close their hearts, be hurt and possibly collapse.
What children need most right now is a sentence: "It's okay, your parents still believe you can move on."
"Accompanying at the right time, not doing things for them, not abandoning them will be the bridge to help your child safely overcome this "transitional period", Mr. Son said.
What should students do after their first failure?
Psychologists advise students, instead of just thinking about "which school to go to", to try asking the question: "How do I want to live? Why do I study?". Many students studying at private schools and continuing education centers are valuable choices if they come with clear goals and a solid companion.
You need to think that failing is not scary, losing yourself after failing is scary. Failing a public school is not the end, but the beginning of another path. The important thing is that you do not define yourself by a door that has just closed, but believe in other openings waiting ahead.
Finally,Mr. Son advised students, after the exam, what can you learn from yourself today to become stronger and more mature. And then, you will understand, there are closed doors for you to find another path that is also full of fun and interesting.
"You need to think that failing is not scary, losing yourself after failing is scary. Failing a public school exam is not the end, but the beginning of another path," said psychologist Tran Dinh Son.
Source: https://tienphong.vn/con-truot-lop-10-cong-lap-cha-me-hay-danh-mot-cai-om-post1757781.tpo
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